Reasonable and compassionate

Enlightenment regained

Thank you, my children. Truth, justice, sweetness and light have been restored. I am most touched by your devotion and esteem.

Well, I'm most touched by the devotion and esteem of most of you, anyway. I see there are a few cynical doubters, still, but I am sure that events will cause them to reconsider their opinions. The suggestion that I myself might have placed those votes to garner further support is, of course, nothing short of scandalous. And certainly untrue. Were I not such a kind and forgiving person I might be taking legal action against the person (myself) who suggested this possibility to me. I am just very lucky that I am not a suspicious and vindictive man.
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Hey, I chose "maybe", but you're not convincing with the whole cat murder thing, you know!
I'm not advocating cat murder. Phil and Caligula are the bloodthirsty carnivores in the flat.
Yet you were the one suggesting (surely then advocating it?) cat murder!

And hey, cats don't have much a choice about their eating patterns. Phil is another matter, of course.
I was merely commenting that a poll provides no proof. If Phil were actually desirous enough of knowing, he'd have to use a different test.
Yet you still chose a test that would involve killing the animal, rather than something less invasive and/or serious!

THIS MAN IS GUILTY, Your honour, of being suspiciously NOT all sweetness and light!
The only way of meauring sweetness is by taste. You can assess sugar concentrations, but it's not the same.
"Sweet" does not need to be taken literally, BioBoy!

And I'm not licking or eating you or the cat. I may be a horrible carnivore, but I draw the line at cannibalism.